Monday, October 5, 2015

Giving It Up For Vacation

(Published in the Janesville Messenger, 6-30-2015)


My father was a dairy farmer, the type of one-man operation that has all but disappeared from our area. From the time of his honeymoon to his retirement nearly 37 years later, he averaged one day of vacation a year. Often, his lone day off would be a trip with my uncles to play the ponies at Arlington Park. My mother rarely received even that limited respite from her responsibilities as farmer's wife and its daily regimen of cooking, cleaning and child-rearing. Any leisure time my parents afforded themselves needed to fall between the morning milking and the evening milking. Their bosses were literally bossies; four or five dozen Holsteins who dictated the work schedule.
 
When I think about my parents' lives, it makes me all the more grateful to have a job that allows me to take vacation, and that we have the opportunity to use that time to create family memories. My wife and I and our two college-age children recently made the long drive out west to visit all five of Utah's spectacular national parks.

I've come to think of vacations as more than sight-seeing tours. They have become the mental equivalent of a cleanse, a detox for the soul. Like a Lenten Season Catholic, I give up things. This year's list was longer than usual: work e-mail, Facebook, caffeine, soda and, um, shaving.
 
Shaving aside, these took some determination. Not checking my work e-mail – and doing actual work – can be a challenge for me. The urge is strong to make sure all is going smoothly with the job that finances these trips. I've written proposals from log cabins Up Nort' and responded to ad agency inquiries standing by the Hollywood sign. But the point of this trip was to be present with my family, consumed by nothing except our time together and the amazing works of nature around us.
 
There are ways to break habits, and as Occam's Razor states, the simplest solution is usually the right one. Once upon a time, I had a tendency to spend weekend afternoons woofing down an entire package of Double Stuf Oreos. At some point I realized that, gee, if they aren't in the house, I can't eat them. So I stopped bringing them home from the grocery store. Likewise, to ensure there would be no succumbing to temptation on this trip, the Gmail application was completely removed from my Smartphone. Ditto the Facebook app, as virtual interactions with friends had become habitual to the point of addiction. Once deleted, however, I didn't give either a second thought. Out of sight was truly out of mind.  
 
Foregoing caffeine had the potential to be painful, and by all rights, it should have been. When your usual daily intake is the equivalent of over a full pot of coffee and/or multiple sodas, you should expect a honey of a caffeine-withdrawal headache, but it never came. It feels like I cheated the system, going cold turkey without adverse symptoms.
 
Naturally, once vacation was over, the e-mail app was re-installed. So was Facebook, though I seriously considered deactivating my account and walking away from it for good. Unfortunately, I feel like I can't, because people would either think I unfriended them or died.
 
Not all of the vacation sacrifices were temporary. My eschewance of soda has been completely maintained; good riddance to aspartame and brominated vegetable oil. And I've only had caffeinated coffee during my regular Sunday morning visits with my mother and brother. Not because I find their company to be sleep-inducing, but because it seems wrong to drink decaf out of the Waffle House mug that I keep at my mother's house. Drinking decaf at a Waffle House (or at my mom's, for that matter) would be like eating a veggie burger at Culver's.
 
As for shaving, I met that one halfway. Let's just say this column might need a new photo.






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