(Published in the Janesville Messenger, 10-20-13)
You're watching an NFL game on
television, and there is a break in the action for commercials. You
hear the opening notes of Stevie Wonder's “Superstition.” You see
Bud Light advertise beer by poking fun at diehard fans and the Game
Day rituals that they believe, through some sort of karma, magically
help their favorite team's performance. It's an amusing campaign that
has stayed alive simply because there is an element of truth to it.
And Bud Light's message is simple: drink our beer to help your team
win.
And that hypothesis is no more
preposterous than, say, wearing your lucky jersey or sitting in the
same spot you occupied the last time your team scored an important
victory. I admit, I have done that. And when I think logically about
it, I know it's absolutely ridiculous or worse yet, unbecoming a
Christian. But I am not
deluded enough to actually believe that my actions or clothing or
choice of seat contribute to a Packers victory or loss.
But you would be surprised how many
actually do. Bud Light did an online survey of fans' Game Day
superstitions. Over one-third of Steelers fans surveyed (36%) believe
their superstitious activities actually affect the outcome of a
game. And down in Houston, Texans fans believe that not
doing their Game Day superstitions has resulted in a Texans loss
(31%) or the opposing team scoring (28%).
That's a pretty heavy responsibility
for a fan to take on. Who wants to be blamed for your favorite team's
loss?
When it comes to sports, my
superstitious tendencies come naturally, handed down by family not
unlike an heirloom that passes through the generations. Though I
broke this habit, I used to participate in the “if I turn the game
off, my team will stop playing poorly” routine that I learned
growing up. But I still possess other idiotic idiosyncrasies.
My worst offense is keeping a mental
note of wins and losses tied to certain behaviors. For example, when
I attend a Brewers game at Miller Park, the team's won-loss
percentage is stellar. I am 10-2 in the last dozen games I have
attended in Milwaukee. If I catch the team on a road trip, however,
then my results are not so good. Witnessing the Brewers play in
Chicago or Minnesota, the team is 0-3. And each loss was particularly
painful – one extra-inning walk-off, one huge lead blown, one good
old fashioned butt-kicking. Does that mean I will never again venture
into another team's stadium to watch the Brewers? Of course not. I'm
a sucker for punishment.
When it comes to the Packers, clothing
and not location seems to make the difference. I own two Packers
jerseys. One is a green John Kuhn that I bought prior to their Super
Bowl victory a couple of years ago. This tends to be my “lucky”
jersey. When worn, the jersey has only experienced one loss but it
was a killer – the playoff debacle versus the 49ers last January.
My other jersey is a blue and yellow throwback, an Aaron Rodgers. The
blue jersey is now 0-5. Its juju is so bad that I actually removed it
during halftime of a game the Packers were losing – and they
promptly came back and won. Maybe those Steelers and Texans fans are
onto something.
So one might ask (that is, if they
believed in such nonsense), why on Earth would I ever wear the
Rodgers jersey again? Because now I'm on a mission. The jersey needs
to get a win. So I am waiting for a game the Packers simply can't
lose to break its unlucky streak. It's too bad we don't play the
Jacksonville Jaguars this year.
Not that it would make a difference.
Right? Right??
