(From the Janesville Messenger, 2-17-08)
Now that Congress has passed the “economic stimulus package,” how are you planning to spend your federal rebate check and “stimulate the economy”? An HDTV, perhaps? Maybe a vacation?
In my case, it’s simply going to pay bills. Because unlike our federal government, I don’t like to be in debt.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ll be grateful to see the cash. It will help pay off the new trombone my daughter needs, as well as a new washer and dryer to replace the ones that have gone kaput after 16 years.
But officially mark me down as someone who is skeptical that this is less an economic fix than it is an election-year ploy. It will be interesting by year’s end to see how this “stimulus” actually shakes out.
We Wisconsinites have been down this rebate road before. Back in 1999, Gov. Tommy Thompson decided to play the role of benevolent king and sent us all “sales tax rebate checks.” Of course, legislators from both parties went along with the plan because, hey, who was going to vote against giving money back to the electorate? Unfortunately, the result is that the state budget has been a mess ever since. Not long after that, Tommy took off for George W. Bush’s cabinet and left unprepared Lt. Gov. Scott McCallum holding the bag. McCallum ended up losing the governorship to Jim Doyle, who has technically balanced the budget via all sorts of accounting tricks. However, if generally accepted accounting principles are used – as they are in private business – the state is over $2 billion in the hole. According to the Wisconsin Taxpayers Alliance, we’re one of only three states with a deficit and the one with the biggest per capita.
At least when Tommy sent out checks, the state had the money. The federal government right now is creating them out of thin air.
Rep. Jim Sensenbrenner of Menomonee Falls was one of the few brave Congressmen to vote against the stimulus package, saying that if the government really wanted to stimulate the economy right now, it could immediately stop federal tax withholding for a few months instead of mailing a check in June. Recently-deceased and much-beloved Gov. Lee Dreyfus did just that in Wisconsin in 1979.
Regardless of the method, the fact remains that by adding $168 billion to the deficit, we’re nearly doubling it. Including the stimulus package, the President’s budget calls for a $400 billion deficit. It’s like being maxed out on your credit card, but having your credit card company suddenly double your credit limit.
So how can we afford to keep spending what we don’t have? We borrow. And we borrow from interesting sources; like China, for example.
The Chinese government is a huge investor in US Treasury bills. In fact, foreign investment in our Treasury bills is in the trillions of dollars (yes, trillions with a “tr”). Is this cause for concern? Not as long as we keep buying products made in China. If we keep stimulating their economy, then they can keep supporting our spendthrift habits.
It’s hard to believe that less than a decade ago, the federal government had a budget surplus. Of course, you can probably pin a lot of the blame for the deficit on the funding of the Iraq War, which was not on our radar in 2000. Still, if I suddenly had catastrophic medical bills that I needed to pay, I wouldn’t be allowed to continue spending like a drunken sailor on other things. There would need to be sacrifice. Ask people who lived through World War II about sacrifices such as rationing.
If you really want to stimulate the economy with your rebate check, instead of spending it, perhaps you should invest it. Author Gregg Easterbrook writes that “It's impossible to be sure, but a rough guess might be that every dollar added to the deficit today represents two dollars subtracted from future economic growth -- which in turn means two dollars taken from the pockets of tomorrow's American adults. This is a cynical exercise, robbing future Americans in order to please voters today.”
He’s right. At some point, the bills are going to come due, and right now, it looks like we’re passing them to our children.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Not-The-Academy-Awards
(From the Janesville Messenger, 2-3-08)
When one topic just won’t do, it’s time for another “Short Attention Span” column. But this time, in honor of the upcoming Academy Awards, we’ll do it Oscar-style.
SIGMUND FREUD AWARD FOR UNCHECKED ID
To the people who misuse the “reader comments” section on the local daily newspaper’s web site. Under the veil of anonymity, some of the comments have gotten so vile and nasty that the paper had to put a list of rules on the site, including - this is not a joke - “Don’t threaten to harm or kill anyone.”
It’s also not a great section to visit if misspellings and poor grammar irritate you.
ANDY WARHOL AWARD FOR BRIEF FAME
To my 80-year-old mother who appeared on national television news, even if it was only for about 15 seconds and her name was spelled wrong. Mom was seen in a brief interview on ABC’s “Good Morning America,” where she gave a glowing review of her newspaper carriers, who have been on the job for 54 years. A friend of mine commented that if the clip lands on YouTube, I’ll have the distinction of having my mother appear on YouTube before me. If I can get the clip, I’ll guarantee that’s the case.
THE ARCHIE BUNKER SEXIST PIG AWARD
This one apparently goes to me. It all sprang out of a conversation with my teenage son, who told me about his lame gym class in which they did...yoga. Yoga? I asked what other units he had in gym class this year. Wrestling? Nope. Football? Nope. Bomberball? Nope. Then it hit me. Are all your classes co-ed? Yep.
Apparently, I was the last person on the planet to realize that single-sex physical education was a thing of the past. I was shocked. I have great memories of my gym classes from junior high and high school, not to mention the tough-as-nails gym teachers we respected and admired. And mind you, as an athlete I was no better than average on my best days.
The consensus of my wife, my closest friend (who is female) and all of their female friends is that I am a sexist pig. Maybe I wouldn’t be one if I had been exposed to co-ed yoga at a young age.
Edith, get me a beer.
THE NOSTRADAMUS AWARD FOR PROGNOSTIFICATION
To football announcer and former player Cris Collinsworth. Prior to the Green Bay Packers-New York Giants NFC Championship game, several football experts were asked to rank Brett Favre among the all-time great quarterbacks. Most had him firmly entrenched in the top five, some as high as number two. But Collinsworth ranked Favre as number 10, saying "I've seen him make mistakes in big games."
One errant pass in overtime later...
THE THOMAS-JEFFERSON-LEFT-OF-GEORGE-WASHINGTON AWARD FOR WORK THAT DOESN’T LAST
To the concrete contractor who put in my driveway and fixed my front steps two years ago.
If you haven’t been to Mount Rushmore, you may not know that Thomas Jefferson’s face was originally sculpted to the left of George Washington. Unfortunately, the rock was unstable and cracked. So they literally blasted Jefferson’s face off the mountain and started over on the right side of George.
Within six months of my new driveway being poured, a long, huge crack developed, and it has been followed by an incredible number of divots. When we complained, the response was, “Too bad.” Now the front steps are disintegrating to the point of needing to be repaired this year. Apparently the term “Satisfaction Guaranteed” in his ad refers to him, not us.
THE THOMAS-JEFFERSON-RIGHT-OF-GEORGE-WASHINGTON “SOLID AS A ROCK” AWARD
To the other concrete contractor we used two years ago, who put in our back patio and back sidewalk. That cement is still perfect. He also correctly predicted that the work the first contractor did to our front steps wouldn’t last.
And finally...
THE MARCIA CLARK AWARD FOR BEST LOSING ARGUMENT
This one also goes to me. On February 17, 2009, all television broadcasting will be converted to a digital signal. If you don’t own a television set with a digital tuner, you’ll either have to buy one or buy a converter box, if your cable or satellite provider doesn’t already provide one.
My television is not digital. In fact, it was purchased on January 8, 1994. I know this because the first show I watched on it was a Packers playoff victory over the Detroit Lions when Favre lofted the winning pass to Sterling Sharpe with less than a minute left.
My wife doesn’t agree that we need a new TV. She doesn’t like to replace things just because they are old and out-of-date.
Which, I guess, explains why I’m still around.
When one topic just won’t do, it’s time for another “Short Attention Span” column. But this time, in honor of the upcoming Academy Awards, we’ll do it Oscar-style.
SIGMUND FREUD AWARD FOR UNCHECKED ID
To the people who misuse the “reader comments” section on the local daily newspaper’s web site. Under the veil of anonymity, some of the comments have gotten so vile and nasty that the paper had to put a list of rules on the site, including - this is not a joke - “Don’t threaten to harm or kill anyone.”
It’s also not a great section to visit if misspellings and poor grammar irritate you.
ANDY WARHOL AWARD FOR BRIEF FAME
To my 80-year-old mother who appeared on national television news, even if it was only for about 15 seconds and her name was spelled wrong. Mom was seen in a brief interview on ABC’s “Good Morning America,” where she gave a glowing review of her newspaper carriers, who have been on the job for 54 years. A friend of mine commented that if the clip lands on YouTube, I’ll have the distinction of having my mother appear on YouTube before me. If I can get the clip, I’ll guarantee that’s the case.
THE ARCHIE BUNKER SEXIST PIG AWARD
This one apparently goes to me. It all sprang out of a conversation with my teenage son, who told me about his lame gym class in which they did...yoga. Yoga? I asked what other units he had in gym class this year. Wrestling? Nope. Football? Nope. Bomberball? Nope. Then it hit me. Are all your classes co-ed? Yep.
Apparently, I was the last person on the planet to realize that single-sex physical education was a thing of the past. I was shocked. I have great memories of my gym classes from junior high and high school, not to mention the tough-as-nails gym teachers we respected and admired. And mind you, as an athlete I was no better than average on my best days.
The consensus of my wife, my closest friend (who is female) and all of their female friends is that I am a sexist pig. Maybe I wouldn’t be one if I had been exposed to co-ed yoga at a young age.
Edith, get me a beer.
THE NOSTRADAMUS AWARD FOR PROGNOSTIFICATION
To football announcer and former player Cris Collinsworth. Prior to the Green Bay Packers-New York Giants NFC Championship game, several football experts were asked to rank Brett Favre among the all-time great quarterbacks. Most had him firmly entrenched in the top five, some as high as number two. But Collinsworth ranked Favre as number 10, saying "I've seen him make mistakes in big games."
One errant pass in overtime later...
THE THOMAS-JEFFERSON-LEFT-OF-GEORGE-WASHINGTON AWARD FOR WORK THAT DOESN’T LAST
To the concrete contractor who put in my driveway and fixed my front steps two years ago.
If you haven’t been to Mount Rushmore, you may not know that Thomas Jefferson’s face was originally sculpted to the left of George Washington. Unfortunately, the rock was unstable and cracked. So they literally blasted Jefferson’s face off the mountain and started over on the right side of George.
Within six months of my new driveway being poured, a long, huge crack developed, and it has been followed by an incredible number of divots. When we complained, the response was, “Too bad.” Now the front steps are disintegrating to the point of needing to be repaired this year. Apparently the term “Satisfaction Guaranteed” in his ad refers to him, not us.
THE THOMAS-JEFFERSON-RIGHT-OF-GEORGE-WASHINGTON “SOLID AS A ROCK” AWARD
To the other concrete contractor we used two years ago, who put in our back patio and back sidewalk. That cement is still perfect. He also correctly predicted that the work the first contractor did to our front steps wouldn’t last.
And finally...
THE MARCIA CLARK AWARD FOR BEST LOSING ARGUMENT
This one also goes to me. On February 17, 2009, all television broadcasting will be converted to a digital signal. If you don’t own a television set with a digital tuner, you’ll either have to buy one or buy a converter box, if your cable or satellite provider doesn’t already provide one.
My television is not digital. In fact, it was purchased on January 8, 1994. I know this because the first show I watched on it was a Packers playoff victory over the Detroit Lions when Favre lofted the winning pass to Sterling Sharpe with less than a minute left.
My wife doesn’t agree that we need a new TV. She doesn’t like to replace things just because they are old and out-of-date.
Which, I guess, explains why I’m still around.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)