(From the Janesville Messenger, 8-3-08)
Bessie, Janesville’s famous cow, stood in the parking lot of the Oasis Restaurant and Shops for over 40 years, until the property was sold and razed to build a new Menards Home Improvement Superstore and Del Taco Mexican Restaurant. After being temporarily moved to an auto repair shop and refurbished, Bessie has returned to the property, now residing in the parking lot next to Del Taco.
This exclusive interview is her first since settling in her new home.
Q: Are you happy to be back on Milton Avenue?
A: Is the Pope Catholic? Does a newborn calf have wobbly legs? (Laughs) Of course! I missed the fresh air outdoors. And I missed my fans.
Q: Was the experience of being away from home traumatic?
A: Was it ever! Cows don’t like change. We like our daily routine. We get milked in the morning, go out to pasture, come back to the barn in the evening when it’s time to get milked again. Anything different throws us off.
Q: How did you cope with the stress?
A: Normally, I would have jumped a fence, but unfortunately I was rooted to the spot. All I could do was to try to relax and find my center. You know, you can’t stop progress. Like when my cousin down in Harvard got moved from the middle of the intersection onto the sidewalk. There’s not much you can do except roll with it.
Q: And your cousin even has an annual festival [Harvard Milk Days] that features her.
A: I know! I was feeling pretty jealous and neglected for a while, until this whole thing came along with the move and whatnot, and I realized just how much Janesville really cares about me.
Q: You were able to go for a ride for the first time in over 40 years. How was that?
A: Being transported while I was lying on my side was a horrible experience. The kids think cow tipping is a big joke, but there’s a reason cows hate it; it messes up our organs. But it was worth it; I got a heck of a makeover. I don’t think I’ve ever looked this good.
Q: Instead of the Oasis, you’re next to Del Taco now.
A: I wish they didn’t serve beef, but that’s just me.
Q: What did you think about the recent controversy regarding the Mexican veil that was draped over your horns?
A: As a cow, I prefer to go au naturel, but once in a while, I don’t mind getting all gussied up for a special occasion.
Q: On a local newspaper discussion site, there was quite a debate about whether a Wisconsin cow should be advertising for a Mexican restaurant.
A: You’re kidding me, right? I’m a big fiberglass cow, people. Get a grip. And I don’t mean on my udders.
Q: Is it strange looking around and seeing the Oasis and the Ramada Inn gone?
A: And don’t forget, the Red Barn was out here, too, way back when, which made me feel right at home obviously. It’s that whole change thing again. Don’t like it, never have. But I’m getting used to it. I’ll tell you one change I’m glad about, though. With the pond filled in, all those dang geese are finally gone. Made it hard for a body to stay clean, if you catch my drift. I’d have to wait for a good gullywasher to come along and make me dainty again.
Q: Anything else you don’t miss?
A: I don’t miss the bar at the Hoffman House, either. I was sick of drunks using my hooves as a restroom in the middle of the night.
Q: Doesn’t being next to a home improvement center instead of a cheese shop deprive you of some of your charm?
A: What? Cows are naturally charming! (Laughs) Seriously, I thought I would stick out like a sore hoof, but it seems to work just fine. Glad I have my back to that roundabout thingy though. I’d probably get dizzy watching it all day.
Q: Any other thoughts you’d like to share with your public?
A: Yeah. I just want to thank all the fans who stop here to have their picture taken with me. That rocks. Way better than a milking machine.
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